Tough Calls and Personal Decisions

I'm going to sign off on the current conversation regarding homelessness with this post. It's been more helpful to me than I expected. Just the act of examining the limited alternatives and the responses I got from the two ministers and from Volunteer Ministries and KARM have been particularly illuminating.

Today I heard from Angie Sledge at KARM.

Here are some of her remarks:

"Panhandling should not be encouraged. When you give to a panhandlers you are, in all likelihood, enabling bad behavior and providing money that will be used for inappropriate activity. One lovely young woman who graduated from KARM’s recovery program 3 years ago told me that she made upwards to $500 per day with her story of being a stranded teenager. Truth was, she was a drug addict who just didn’t look “street weary” yet. When people gave her money, they were actually making it harder for her to make the decision to get clean."


Ms. Sledge suggests simply saying "You need to go to KARM. They can help you.” If they say they were turned away they are not being honest, or they are a sex offender or exhibit violent behavior, since those are the only two categories of people who are screened.

She also took the time to respond to each of the choices in the poll:

1. “get a job” – "hard, if not impossible, when you don’t have employment skills; day laboring won’t keep a roof over your head; often they can’t pass a drug test"

2. “avoid eye contact/keep walking” – "that is what the homeless are used to – being ignored, being treated as inhuman; the key factor to someone getting off the street for good is relationship – being treated as a valuable human being – restoring human dignity. So look the person in the eye and say, “Go to KARM.” Then walk on."

3. “decide if they look like they really need the money” – "we can’t judge; looks are deceiving, and people from all walks of life can be manipulative and manipulated"

4. “offer to help in some other way” – "when you do this, you are putting yourself at risk; support the organizations that are experienced and skilled in working with this population; donate your time and money to the right organizations."

She also asked that I encourage my readers to come to KARM to see what they do. Consider yourself encouraged.

So, the information is all in (though I wish I'd heard back from the other ministers). What now? As for  the poll questions, I'd say the first option isn't something I would ever do. I don't know their story and besides, most of the people I meet in this situation aren't employable in their current condition.

I'll certainly admit to avoiding eye contact and walking on. I don't feel good about it, but on the other hand, downtown Knoxville is my neighborhood. I don't "come to town" once a month or even on the weekends. I walk these streets every day. Sometimes I want a walk just to be a walk, not a social service intervention. Sometimes I'm with family or friends and I just don't want to be forced into dealing with someone else. I understand that it is dehumanizing to avoid eye contact, but I also know that making eye contact and speaking to a person is often seen as an invitation to ask for money.

I do sometimes evaluate a situation and I'm going to try to stop that. I think the idea of doing something different to help might be an appropriate alternative if it is carefully defined help. For example, suggesting that they seek out one of the agencies we've talked about is helpful, though not necessarily what they are after.

I also have a hard time shaking the words of Jesus, "I was hungry and you gave me food. I was thirsty and you gave me drink." When the apostles said, "When did we do this?" Jesus said if you've done it for anyone, you done it for him. Regardless of your religion or lack of one, that is a high and honorable ethical principle. Still, in 2010, it doesn't necessarily mean that you do it directly.

I'm thankful for everything I have and I have far more materially than I ever expected. For me, that carries an obligation to help others. In the Jewish, Christian and Muslim traditions, it is understood that a certain portion of one's wealth should be given to others. I think this is a good life guide, no matter your tradition.

John Wesley said, "Having first gained all you can, and secondly saved all you can, then give all you can." Giving a dollar or two to someone on the street isn't likely to help them and, I'm afraid, most of the time when we do that we are really attempting to assuage our own guilt, rather than realistically hoping to help. So, I believe most of us should give a significant amount of our income to help others and to make our world better. This may mean giving to your church, to Volunteer Ministries, to KARM or whatever organization you think will help - or giving to multiple organizations.

But that still leaves the basic question: What to do on the street, one on one?

I'm going to commit to not giving money to anyone. I'm also going to try more often to engage the persons who ask for my help because, while I can't imagine having a conversation with everyone who asks for anything, I do understand the dehumanizing impact of being treated as if they are invisible.

I also plan to attempt to put together three simple items that I can package and hand to them: A list of places to get help, with phone numbers and addresses, a granola bar (food) and a gift certificate for a cup of coffee (drink). For me this feels like a good compromise. I don't think I'm doing harm. I'm responding to a need. I'm directing them to a place they can get true help. I can fit it in my pocket and always be ready.

So will I follow through or drop the idea and go back to ignoring these people on the streets? I'll let you know. While my decision is a personal one, that still leaves you with a decision to make. Do you feel good about what you've been doing? Do you plan to try something different?

What they are Saying

I've begun hearing from some of the people I've contacted and it looks like a united front, so far, on the side of not giving money. Still, there are a few nuances I'll try to tease out as we consider (or at least I do :-)) what our response might be. There are four days left to respond to the poll and I hope you'll all do that. The answers are spreading out a bit, though most of us, so far, are in the mode of avoiding eye contact and moving on.

Daryll Rasnake, a Pastor at Church Street United Methodist, works daily with homeless persons. Church Street maintains an open door policy so, often, those entering are homeless. Whenever someone panhandles at the church he engages them and offers help. He feels that once money is given, an expectation follows and aggressive behavior often results at any subsequent denial. His advice is never to give money and he relates a story of a homeless person who died last winter after getting money on Cumberland that was used to get drunk and later, in his drunkenness, a candle was overturned and he died inside his tent. Clearly this was not the intention of the person who gave the money, but it happened all the same.

He continues . . .


"So what is the best alternative? I believe it is to engage in a relationship. . . This can be to simply have a conversation and try to talk about what the real need is. If the real need is food, first realize that food is pretty readily available in Knoxville. . . Offer to buy a meal and bring it back. . . Never offer a ride or go alone even with someone who looks harmless. If you're in a group, invite them to join you . . . never ever give money for prescriptions or medications. . .we often get requests for bus fare on KAT. . . KAT passes are sold at the transfer station for $0.50 on the dollar and thereby become currency. . . I will never say to someone I don't have cash because frankly that is a lie. . . I want to treat our homeless friends as human beings deserving of our best care and concern. It is the flippant response that is so often expected and given (avoidance or the quick handout) that creates a situation of devaluing their humanity."

Bill Shiell, Senior Pastor at First Baptist Church said none of the above options work every time, because situations are each different. . . He says he never gives cash. He continues, "If there is time, I talk, assess, and treat them as I would anyone else who wants to stop and talk. If there is a request for food, I suggest places where they can find food that's available. We have about 6 free meals daily in downtown Knoxville that I'm aware of. If it's shelter, I suggest where they can find shelter. After that, it depends on the situation . . ."

Ginny Weatherstone, Chief Executive Officer, Volunteer Ministries Center, says she discourages people from giving money, but suggests giving them information as to where they "might receive help."


She continues: ". . . many of Knoxville’s panhandlers are not homeless and it’s not accurate to assume that they are. . . there are adequate services in Knoxville to meet the immediate needs of the homeless. . . Three meals a day are served at KARM and you do not have to be enrolled in a program to get a meal there. . . other agencies serve meals, VMC being one of them, but they may require you to be involved with particular programming. . . They have options without resorting to panhandling.

"One of the scenarios you mentioned was about a woman who said that she was refused help with her medication because she had a home in Townview Towers. Specifically, she stated that VMC said they could not help because she has a home. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, VMC has a particular program, the Bush Family Refuge, that helps people who are marginally housed . . . Quite often I hear that someone told an individual that they were refused services, etc. and it is simply not true. One strategy is to offer to call the agency and inquire for them. When this offer is made, the story sometimes changes or the person goes away. . . It is widely known that we (verify stories); sometimes people will say that VMC refused to help and that is true; their story simply did not check out.
"Most agencies will welcome your inquiring on behalf of someone you might encounter. Do not hesitate to call them. And instead of giving to panhandlers, I suggest that you contribute to the agencies that serve the poor and homeless. Speaking for VMC, I would invite you to make an appointment for a tour and to learn more about how we work with people in need.

"The line I usually use is simply “I’m sorry, I don’t give to panhandlers. If you truly want help, I’ll be glad to tell you where you can go but I won’t give you any money.”

Finally, another comment was posted on the original story. In case you missed it, the person stated that they had talked to the same person I had who told the story about the prescription and hungry children at home. This commenter said that she (he) finds it hard to give money to people who rehearse a story and tell it over and over.

So, there you are. There is still time to participate in the poll or to comment below. I'm not going to stay on this topic forever, but I felt it was important enough to entertain for a few days. I'll wrap it up, soon,and give some final thoughts. I'm still waiting to hear from the Episcopal, Presbyterian and Catholic churches, should they care to join the discussion.